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Fight or Flight

- Excerpt of a letter from Cate to her lover

The majority of the time I know what I do. Run. More often than not, I end up as road kill, which is interesting since, when I careen down the road, I will swerve before I do harm and invariably hurt myself in the process. Sometimes people run over you by accident. Sometimes they pull you out of the way, tsk over your broken self, get in your car that you busted your ass over and drive away to show off their shiny new ride.You did that to me.

So here I am, splattered all over the road, picking myself up and wondering if it is worth it as I watch the tail lights of my shiny ride become distant points of light that are slipping away. You have two choices - take a stand and take it back or walk away. Either way, you lose. Beware the taker disguised as a giver. They slice you to bits and are everywhere - at home, at work, at play, at the corner store.

It isn't about you; it's about me and my not-so-temporary insanity. This is my world, my small corner in an otherwise overwhelming community of people, my small voice whispering in the midst of the bigger, badder voices and if I want to rant, I'll rant. I have nowhere else to do it. Will I regret this - maybe. Will I take it back - quite possibly. Or not. Maybe, if I come to my senses. What are the odds...

Take a stand. Fight for what is yours or turn the fuck around, shut the fuck up and let it go. But don't come crying with wringing hands because you let go of something that mattered. Isn't that what you said?

You cast a shadow that is larger than life and I will never be able to step out from behind it. My broken heart is letting you go, my trembling hands are opening and setting you free. You carry a piece of my soul; I will diminish and fade. Your light doesn't reach me anymore and you don't reach out; you just take what I have left and move on.

Remember you are where you are because of me and what I gave you - what you took so freely - my love and my life. And know that as I weaken and wither, what you took will eat away at your black soul. That is my only consolation.

Memory Like a Sieve

Whenever I make something for the Sims I like to check it out and make certain it looks decent. So when I made a painting for Beth's new house with Cooper and looked at it in a test lot, I decided to finish decorating a couple of lots I started way back when my game was stable and I had a neighborhood. One of those lots is Dani's. And since it makes perfect sense that she would have pictures on her wall of her and Blade's wedding, I decided I needed to take some wedding shots. And then I got carried away...

It has been so long since I did anything in the game that I forgot my cheat codes. I forgot what my pose box collection icon looks like. And unfortunately I did not have the rings. However, I am relatively happy with the results even though I took 46 shots when I needed only 9. I will post one here, the only one I fooled around with in Photoshop. The rest are on my other blog where I post things that are not related to Studio Time. Eventually the name of that blog will come to me. As I said, it's been awhile...

Some background for those who care...

Dani and Alex were married in late summer. They took their wedding vows shortly before noon, had an early dinner reception and danced until the sun began to set. If you wonder why Alex doesn't look all smiley in some of them, it is because he is not a morning person. Nevertheless, those half lidded eyes and seductive smiles of his never failed to light Dani's heart and passion. The shot above was taken just before they left for their hotel room. They honeymooned for ten days in Fiji. Danica made a lovely bride I think, and Blade looked quite dapper in tails. Not sure if that is what is called a morning suit or not...someone with more knowledge than I have probably could set me straight on that.

Link is here -> You are cordially invited...

ETA: This is the reason for the photo shoot.

WTF

I am as baffled as she is right now about many things. Dad is hanging on although the clots in his lungs are still life-threatening, I am racking up miles on a rental car and am on a first name basis with the guy at the toll booth. I should get a discount on the bridge toll I believe. I am picking away at the next update when I can. It is a welcomed distraction from RL.

Many thanks to my friends who reached out when I needed it. You will not be forgotten nor will your kindness.