My life has been a series of changes; I suppose that is true and expected for everyone. But there has been too much, too soon for my comfort level. I don't deal well with it. At one time I considered myself a tumbleweed rolling with the wind. Maybe at one time I was. Right now I just want to wake up every morning with no greater challenge than to find my keys in a darkened house.
Some things however do stay the same. I looked into Facebook, something that everyone is doing to stay connected, find new connections, whatever. Everyone I work with does it. I figured what the hell. You have to add friends so of course the first place I looked was my kids. LMAO at what I found, nothing I didn't know but amusing to see it in technicolor. Or black and white and various shades in between. It was a fascinating trip down memory lane.
But in scanning their list of friends, seeing familiar names from pre-school to now, it was comforting to know they had that solid foundation, that connection that has supported them through so many heartaches. I don't have that kind of connection anymore, not to that extent. I used to but it turned to dust and blew away. Family, friends, they are everywhere but here. I miss the parties, the BBQs, I miss the people that made them special. So I am living vicariously through my boys. They are the grill masters now. Thankfully they love it when I hang with them and so do their friends. I am the mom that is more like one of the guys than anything else. I like that. I get to be cool.
Blah, blah, blah. I bet you thought this was a Sims blog. I decided it was whatever I make it. Including a long ramble about nothing really. Hell, if you made it this far through the post you deserve a gold star.
It keeps coming back to that one theme that drifts in and out. Everything changes. And everything stays the same.
Now this girl needs to learn a thing or two about paper airplanes, such as what happens when it drills you in the face. She'll figure it out. Maybe this is a Sims blog after all. *shrug*
That paper airplane is alot like life huh? You never know which direction it may fly - or even if it will launch like you want it to. It can be a lot of fun or the greatest pain to repeatedly throw and get to fly right.
ReplyDeleteAnd then there are the ones that turn themselves around to poke you in the eye like Miranda's. Pretty fun, unpredictable and then all of a sudden scary all at the same time.
Sounds like life to me. Constantly changing without any notice at all.
Smile. Children were always meant to be our light right when we desperately need it and our Blessing. Somebody up there knew that I think way in advance. If it takes living through them to keep on living for another moment then enjoy those blessings!
That's one thing I am grateful never changes,
- You take the time to plant a seed of love in them, cherish them, raise them to the best of your ability and one day they come back to return the favor
... its your turn to enjoy the roses you cared for...be sure you do just that! Be encouraged!
(Sorry for the book above!)
You know I hadn't thought about it but yes, that plane is a lot like life. I do wonder though, do we ever get it right? Life I mean. There are no do-overs (blieve me, I keep asking).
ReplyDeleteI am grateful for my boys. I have a picture of them in my cubicle at work. A colleague mentioned to me that not only were they good looking but they were beautiful. That they are.
I am encouraged. Despite the moaning and groaning and whining I could be much worse off than I am.
No worries about the book. There's no word count here. And thank you.
You know what I'm going to say. Nothing ever ever goes in the direction you plan.
ReplyDeleteHard rain takes out the paper airplane. But that might be the better option since the alternative might have been poking out somebody's eye. Something you may have regretted more than the loss of the plane.
Sending much love and even more rain. Open the windows.
I don't really have anything productive to say :D
ReplyDeletechanges are good, we always learn from them...
I do agree, the paper plane is a lot like life...
Take care Gayl and be happy, enjoy your voice and one day I really hope I will also be a cool mom like you :D :P hugs!
Life is life, you can't get "Life" wrong, there can be wrong and right choices but hey it's the journey not the destination. You have great friends, they just happen to also be your children. Nothing wrong with that! Someday, I said Someday, you will be the cool Grandma. And won't the close relationship you have with your sons be exactly what they need when they start to raise their own children. Good thoughts to you, love your writings, musings, etc.
ReplyDeleteA major "Fangirl"
Gayl, a bit on the flip side. In 1989 I went to a job I'd been at for nearly five years expecting just another day. By noon, I was cleaning out my desk because I'd been laid off. Fortunately, there weren't too many secretaries around as most had gone off to lunch.
ReplyDeleteAt the time, it seemed very bad. I'd just gotten married, and now here I was without a job. But, in the long run, they did me a favor. I hadn't realized how rundown I'd gotten, how tired, how I'd just been going through the motions when life should have been great, I hadn't been married a year. The job was really stressful, I should have quit, but really who can actually bring themselves to quit a job? Anywhere you go could be worse.
Where'd I go? Back to work at a strange little place, but I only stayed there five months before this time I did quit. My husband and I decided it was time I try to get published. I spent seven years at home writing and being with my elderly m-i-l.
To paraphrase the song: sometimes change is a second chance. :)
I've always found good things come from change; you just have to wait for them.
S.B. Thank you. For the love and the rain. Could not have come at a better time.
ReplyDeleteS@ndy: Changes are good. I just don't want to keep standing on the fault line waiting to fall down. I need to step out the door as someone I care about reminded me. And yes, one day you will be a cool mom!
Fangirl: Thank you so much for the kind words and good thoughts. I am constantly reminded how lucky I am when I look at them and they have been a constant source of strength when I really wanted to give up.
Lachesis: You're right about good things coming from change. It's just the senseless stuff that hits me in the head. I go through my blue periods and then snap out of it. I really should stop crying all over my blog though huh? LOL! Every day that I wake up is a second chance. I just need to stop looking over my shoulder.
Thank you all for the kind words. It means so much to me.
Gayl, life is over-whelming. Sometimes you really just have to let it out. It makes the whelming a little less over and and little more under. So to speak. LOL
ReplyDeleteAfter that statement, obviously I've really got to get back to my story, I still can't seem to figure out exactly where it's going. :/ I'm just procrastinating by wandering around here online.
Btw, every time I see your cinnamon roll, I get hungry for the fattening thing, thank you very much. :p
LOL! Yes those are my favorites, had one this morning in fact. Morning buns. Gotta love 'em.
ReplyDelete